Friday, May 02, 2003

 

May 2, 2003: 6.41pm

if you should die before me ask if you can bring a friend

posted by Brianne 5:41 pm

 

May 2, 2003: 4.47pm

the power of prayer

Byrd (1988) conducted a randomised controlled trial of intercessory prayer for patients admitted to a coronary care unit. Patients prayed for by Christians outside the hospital needed less ventilatory assistance, antibiotics and diuretics.

posted by Brianne 3:50 pm

 

May 2, 2003: 2.58pm

the cows are in the field again

The clouds hang heavily in the sky and Ludovico Einaudi plays in the background. Has anyone ever noticed how there are combinations of music and weather which accompany each other perfectly? When the clouds are like this, low and and heavy (pregnant clouds), Le Onde seems to be the perfect partner to the day. It's the sort of day when i could quite happily curl up in a comfy chair with a good book, dive into another world until my senses are drowning. Those are the days when i cannot bare to leave those other worlds, when the pain of the separation brings tears to my eyes. But today the weather will go to waste, i must return my revision, there is no escape today.

yes esther i spoke about weather again, but it truly does affect me. It can be so beautiful and yet so cruel. It reflects my moods and vice versa. Days of sunshine when the world seems full of opportunity, days when the rain has just been and everything feels fresh and alive, and days when the sky is filled with thunder and lightning and every nerve echoes the electricity.

Weather is worth talking about, it is truly beautiful. So many faces, so many moods...will one ever know her.

posted by Brianne 1:58 pm

Thursday, May 01, 2003

 

May 1, 2003: 4.13pm

the battle of the dandelions and the daisies

can you see the yellow flowers?

The daisies have control of one corner of the field, the dandelions the other 3. The dandelions are bigger and brighter and they have more of the field but the daisies are not to be underestimated. Unbeknownst to the dandelions they are coming in from the rear and they have infiltrated the dandelion ranks with spies. I stand at the window and watch history repeat itself. The meaner side of nature plays itself out right beneath our noses and we are unaware. Or are we? Perhaps we are just turning a blind eye to the massacre that goes on. As the finale draws near, with the thrum of the lawnmower blades growing louder, we draw our curtains and tend our pot plants.

posted by Brianne 3:13 pm

Wednesday, April 30, 2003

 

April 30, 2003: 8.33pm

It is a beautiful evening. Out of esther's window it seems a spotlight has been switched on; the low sun makes the trees greener and the sky bluer and there is a very still quality to the atmosphere, i think time has stopped. Out my window the sky is very different. It is filled with low clouds, bruised around the edges, and the sky (where i can see it) is a pale blue making me think of early dawn. The trees are very quiet, tucked up for sleep, just a gentle swaying of their branches as if the wind wishes to lull them into sweet dreams...and perhaps me too. Is this a sweet dream? of an achingly beautiful world? or is it real and we are too awake to ourselves to see it? Then let me sleep a little longer. But already i'm awakened by bad music drifting up from the flat below, a helicopter cuts through the beautiful sky and i am becoming aware once again of my revision left forgotten on my desk.

posted by Brianne 7:33 pm

 

April 30, 2003: 3.33pm

Today I have been reading an article about positive illusions. It is thought by some that it is essential for our mental health that we see ourselves in a positive light and as we cannot be absolutely wonderful at everything we have many unrealistically positive opinions about ourselves and our achievements. Experiments have shown that the majority of people will rate themselves more positively, on a variety of traits and abilities, than the average person. Unfortunately for them it does not hold that everyone is better than the average person - who gets to be the average person? If you are the average person out there you are rare but also a dumbass (condolences). So, taking me (hands raised in Kenneth Brannagh style) for example, i think i play the flute badly but based on what has been said previously this is a positive illusion so i must sound really awful (i'm thinking cat through a wringer awful). In fact the only people to show anywhere near realistic views of themselves are the clinically depressed.
So the lesson for today? Lie to yourself, your mental health depends on it.

posted by Brianne 2:34 pm

Tuesday, April 29, 2003

 

April 29, 2003: 10.37

okay, cats have been redeemed in my eyes. Well done Annie, I wish you were my cat.

posted by Brianne 9:36 pm

 

April 29, 2003: 10.29pm

i knew there was a reason why i was wary of my cats...

posted by Brianne 9:29 pm

 

April 29, 2003: 5.01pm

I'm a treeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!



Congratulations, you're a Dryad, a playful tree spirit.
What kind of female faerie are you?
Take the female faerie quizby Paradox

posted by Brianne 4:03 pm

Sunday, April 27, 2003

 

April 27, 2003: 3.48pm

Love seeketh only self to please,
To bind another to its delight,
Joys in another's loss of ease,
And builds a Hell in Heaven's despite.'

Blake
the clod and the pebble

posted by Brianne 2:47 pm

 

April 27, 2003: 3.31pm

Sunday

fallen blossom blowing across the roads, suicidal birds throwing themselves under car wheels, numb bums in church seats, sunshine and fine breezes, good food and wine with good friends and laughter, dried out contact lenses in tired eyes and a stimulating coffee in my hands.

posted by Brianne 2:29 pm

 

April 27, 2003: 3.24pm

'Love seeketh not itself to please,
Nor for itself hath any care,
But for another gives its ease,
And builds a Heaven in Hell's despair.'

Blake
the clod and the pebble

posted by Brianne 2:23 pm